introduction

The last two years have been full of changes for me, forcing me to grow, reflect, grow again, reflect again, etc. Doing the assessment this time made me stand still to reflect on the whole path I took, which has been rocky, turbulent and extraordinary. Seeing back to the person and work I was/made three years ago opened my eyes to where I am now.

Let me put some context to that. Doing the assessments before, I was in the middle of my school journey and doing the assessment felt like I had to ‘proof’ being good enough, besides already doing the normal assignments and projects. Looking back, I didn’t take the moment to fully reflect for myself but I was doing an assignment for school. That resulted in an competence portfolio without much creativity, written by the book and done without a lot of enthusiasm.

Some of my growth has come from outside the walls of the academy, since I have been away for a year, wherein I joined my partner and lived with him in Chili, Ecuador and Canada. After the motive of school fell away, I didn’t creatively work on anything for a long time. But not being in school for a year made me so much more motivated for the final year. I also appreciate going to school again, as I see it now as the opportunity to take as much knowledge as I can, in the way that it suits me. I also realize that the academy has much potential to help you, but you are the one that needs to take it out.

During this year I realized that I don’t want to be a ‘full time artist’ or living from my art. In the moment where my practice is not coming from a free experimental state, I won’t enjoy making. So working in art, taking commissions for example, will take away my joy for creating. However the minor that I chose was quite theoretical and academic and proved to be the perfect stimulant for my creativity again, as I started to do a lot of free material experiments to get my mind off the heavy academic topics.

So instead of pursuing a career in the arts, I found that I take my pleasure and motivation from the free, innocent and experimental curiousness without intent. And this state of mind is brought out by doing the exact opposite: heavy thinking! This made me realize that for me it will be important to find a good balance within those two elements to sustain a healthy mind and a creative outlet.

You will see that I’ve written and designed this portfolio following my vision and voice, even if that sometimes meant coloring outside the lines of the assignment. However I feel that I used this opportunity to thoroughly reflect on my practice and I hope you will enjoy seeing my journey as much as I had making it!